...In the rich man’s world

As the summer season begins to draw to a close actors will finish up with their contracts. No matter how many contracts you’ve done, in stock, in the regions or on Broadway, the shows all eventually close (except Starlight in Germany. That thing’s been running for almost 30 years). Then an Actor’s thoughts turn to “What’s next?” After my first summer stock gig away from home I stared head on into the void of this question.

This was a new experience for me. I never had to decide what to do before. In the past I did what my parents told me to do. When I went away to school I did what my teachers told me to do. There was no choice.

Now I had options to weigh. Take another contract with the company, which meant working through the fall up until Christmas or do a show with the musical director I had just worked with, back in my hometown. Due to a lifelong fear of being stuck in suburbia, I chose to take another contract. I would be making $85 a week, instead of doing a Christmas show at home making $220 a week.

After that $85 a week contract ended, “What’s next” reared its ugly head again. At this point the question was at least partially answered. I was going home for Christmas. I was always home for the holidays. One of the hold overs from growing up under the reign of Emperor and Empress Dad and Mom. I didn’t mind though. I loved being home for the holidays. No place is more magical than my hometown during Christmas. However this holiday season there was a different kind of magic in the air. No sugar plums danced in my head. The only thing in my head was the thought of moving to New York City.

Three of my friends from University, Fred, Hazel and Lester had all moved to the city to go to grad school. Fred went to Columbia while Hazel and Lester went to NYU. I too had toyed with going to grad school, but decided I’d had enough of schooling. I wanted to move on with my life. Still I was jealous of those three for taking a chance and moving.

While I was home during this particular holiday season I was in contact with another alumnus who graduated with me, Contadina. She was working a regular job in the area. After much conversation we decided we would move to New York City together. We had a plan to conquer the unknown hand in hand, much like we did when we went to the NETC’s together and got our first away from home theatre jobs. The only thing we didn’t have was a definitive moving date. And that scared me.

As a child I knew I had to get out of suburbia. I hated it. It was boring, and everyone knew my family and our business. There was no anonymity, no escaping the drudgery of life there. Besides that my parents’ number two rule, number one being “you live in my house therefore you live by my rules”, was if you lived at home you had to be in school or have a job. Grad school was out. Having a job meant putting down roots. Putting down roots meant staying in suburbia. Not an option.

So I got nervous. And antsy. And impetuous.  After New Year’s Day I announced to the world that I was moving to New York...in two weeks. I called Contadina and told her of the plan. She said she didn’t want to go so soon. She needed to make more money for the move first.

So I left her in suburbia.

I had been to New York before, but on January 15 I came to the City with the intention of living here. I had three suitcases, two hundred dollars and just me.

Plane ticket $300

Baggage fee $50

I had contacted Fred, who was living in the dorms at Columbia. He didn’t have a roommate at the time. The other students in the quad had people stay with them, so he thought he could as well. He also thought it would be a great help if I had a place to stay for a while until I got acclimated to the City.

I arrived on a Friday. I quickly found I hadn’t fully thought the move through. I had a temporary place to live but I needed work to support myself. Two hundred dollars wasn’t going to stretch very far. Another friend of mine whom I had just performed with was already living and working in the city. He gave me the name of his temp agency.  I had some office skills so I thought office temp work would be a great fit. On Monday I went in for an interview and placement testing.

I started doing temp work right away. There were times however when I didn’t feel like getting out of bed. So I didn’t go into work. That’s one of the perks of being a temp. You can work or not work as you choose. However there was one time where I had no choice. I had enough money for one subway ride, after I had taken the quarters out of my loafers. So it was either go to work, make money and then walk home or go get the check, cash it and buy some groceries to eat.

I picked up the check.

Monthly NYC metro card $116

Food $20 per day (not including eating out or ordering in)

I also went to as many auditions as possible. Not an easy feat when booked for weeks at a time as a receptionist at Morgan Stanley, Price Waterhouse, Skandia America and the like. But I did book performing gigs. The “loafer quarter incident” came right before a two year stretch of constant performing work. That’s why I had come to New York to live and perform...and to use my new headshots.

Headshots have different looks and requirements depending on where you’re home of operations are based. No matter how great the photographer was back home, those pictures aren’t going to be on par with the ones from New York or any other major theatrical city.

Before my first stock job away from home ended, I was able to have my pictures taken by a cast member. I skipped having to search for someone. He was from New York City and a budding photographer. He knew that headshot world. My only task was picking two pictures and having them retouched. Then have the pictures set with my name and a border of some sort. Only then could I take them to be reproduced in mass quantities to be used at auditions.

Headshots $1000

My rent free time at Fred’s had come to an end. The University had gotten wind of all the unauthorized people staying in the dorm and pulled the plug on it. So I moved to a rent free stint at another friend’s place in Brooklyn.

After graduating with me, Jean had moved to the city for work. She had an entry level job at MTV. She was also auditioning and doing cabarets and shows. Staying with her only lasted a week or so. The guy who took my headshots had booked a show out of town and needed a sublet. I was in need of a place so it was a match made in heaven.

I packed up my things. With the help of Fred, Lester and Jean I moved from Brooklyn to Washington Heights...on the subway. It was an adventure. We still talk about it to this day. Unfortunately Hazel wasn’t around for this monumental move. Before entering her second semester at NYU, she decided City life and the life of an actor wasn’t for her. She quit school and moved back upstate.

Now on top of the monthly

Cell phone $120

came the monthly expenses of:

Electricity $100

Television $60- $200 depending on the provider and the package

Internet $30

I was subletting a furnished place. Everything was there that I needed. I didn’t even have to purchase sheets. Otherwise I would have had additional expenses. My friend Helga who moved to the City from Albuquerque was also living in a sublet. Hers wasn’t furnished. She was living out of free milk crates from the grocery store and a blow up mattress.

Furniture - $?

It’s a necessity for any performing artist to be completely connected to the web with a fast reliable system. These days everyone who’s been through school has some sort of computing/printing system. The system should be capable of video and audio recording, Skyping, printing good quality prints on a variety of paper and of course be wireless.

Laptop/Computer $500- $2400

Printer $100

Thanks to friends I had a place to sleep and a place to work. I had the materials for auditions. So as things kept rolling along I started to take class.

The Performing Arts do not exist in a vacuum. It’s a vast community of artists and teachers and networking. Moreover techniques in dance, voice and acting get rusty when not applied and exercised daily. An actor has to take some sort of class. Besides keeping up on the aspect of talent that’s the money maker, to be more marketable an actor has to expand and build on peripheral talents as well.

Monthly Voice lessons $400

Monthly Dance classes $400

Acting/Improv lessons $400

I was honing my skills, meeting people and making friends. We would go to auditions together. We would help one another out with leads on jobs. We would circulate information about apartment sublets and share which classes were good and which to avoid. My friend Arthur told me about an audition once. I ended up booking the gig. It was there I met Manuel who shared an apartment with another dancer.

Manuel lived on 187^th street. It was a one bedroom apartment.  The other dancer spent most of his time on tour so Manuel wanted someone to split the rent with him. I was finishing up two years of constant theatre work. I would bounce into town for a small stint and then it was back out again. I had no base of operations save my three suitcases. I was going to be needing a place to call home. So I moved in with the two of them. 

Manuel was subsequently assisting a choreographer on a theme park show which I auditioned for it and then got cast. All the people in the cast were wonderful and we became fast friends. We had so much fun that hot and wild summer. It was there that I met and became friends with Amir.

Amir was of German and Egyptian descent and he was beautiful. When he walked into any room, everyone stared at him, guys and girls alike. He had chestnut colored hair, olive complexed skin and the most amazing crystal green eyes. To top all of that off he came from money. A lot of it. His father would write a twenty thousand dollar plus check every semester for his university tuition.

Amir was graduating with a degree in dance. He was moderately talented. That’s to say he had talent but he was no more talented than anyone else. His dancing was fine. His singing was fine and his acting was fine. Like a good majority of people, he dreamed about moving to New York and being on Broadway.  So he made a decision that after he graduated he was moving.

Amir and I got along amazingly well. We had become such good friends that we decided to find an apartment to share when he moved to New York.

Very small Studio apartment $1300 per month

Broker’s fee $2500

Move in cost (first month’s rent and security deposit) $2600

However we were young performers with little to no credit history and an erratic job history. To rent an apartment we needed a guarantor for the lease. The guarantor is someone who is legally responsible for paying the rent for the length of the rental agreement if the signed lease holders are not be able to do so. That person has to make one hundred times the monthly rent of the apartment, have outstanding credit and limited financial liabilities. According to some brokers the guarantor also has to live in the tristate area, which consists of New York, New Jersey and Connecticut.

When I left home I vowed not to ask my parents for financial help. I didn’t want to put that kind of pressure on them. My two younger siblings would be looking towards college soon. I didn’t think my parents could financially handle that and me and their home and their cars and their lives.

Finances weren’t something we discussed in my family. We had everything we needed. And within reason we had everything we wanted. When we could afford some extravagance we had it. When we couldn’t we didn’t. The ways and means of middle class suburbia are that simple.

So in truth I had no idea if they could’ve financially helped me even if I had asked.

Recently on Facebook I saw a post from a former colleague of mine about this very thing:

"There is a drunk girl at a bar yelling that all people on Broadway have their rent paid by their parents. And that everyone that goes to auditions has their rent paid by their parents. #Delusional"

Amir’s dad ended up being the guarantor for the apartment. That didn’t make a difference for me though. Between the time Amir and I had worked together and his move to New York, Amir and Manuel had worked together. How it come about I don’t know, but they’d decided to find an apartment together. The other dancer living with Manuel and me was gone. This left me out in the cold, especially when I discovered Manuel had been forging a name on the lease.

But that’s a different story.

Amir moved to the city. He and Manuel got an apartment in midtown Manhattan. Amir proceeded to audition, take class and network. He didn’t have a day job. He lived off the dividends from the stocks his Grandfather had given him for graduation. Within two years he had a production contract on Broadway. A year later he got disillusioned and not only left show business but left the city.

Jean had worked up to middle management at MTV. She was still working on performing and actually booked a paying gig. Then the woman she was subletting from kicked her out. Jean didn’t like the instability of it all. She moved back upstate.

Contadina finally saved up enough money and moved to New York. Once here she didn’t have to work a day job to support herself. She proceeded to audition and take lessons. Before she went through the entirety of her savings she booked a performing gig. And another. And another. Six Broadway shows and countless regional and stock gigs later, Contadina’s still working.

That recent Facebook post:

"There is a drunk girl at a bar yelling that all people on Broadway have their rent paid by their parents. And that everyone that goes to auditions has their rent paid by their parents. #Delusional"

Continued on:

"...I guess she was in the business at some point but left because it was so expensive to take classes and audition...she yelled down the bar that she didn’t care if everyone here was a Broadway star “I know their parents pay their rent”...I’m sorry she didn’t have any success but people who did aren’t spoiled. They are probably more talented, confident, and driven."

As I look back on what I did all those years ago, moving to New York City with just two hundred dollars, three suitcases and refusing to ask for my parents help, I’m astonished that I’m still here. Out of my graduating class there are three who are still pursuing performing: myself, Contadina and Lester. Talent, confidence and drive only play a small part. Most actors leave the business because of the cost of living associated with Life in the Arts:

One-time costs:

Plane ticket $300

Baggage fee $50

Broker’s fee for apartment $2500

Move in cost $2600

Furniture $?

Monthly costs:

Studio apartment $1300

Metro card $116

Food $560

Cell phone $120

Electricity $100

Television $60- $200

Internet $30

Voice lessons $400

Dance classes $400

Acting/Improv lessons $400

Intermittent costs:

Headshots $1000

Laptop/Computer $500- $2400

Printer $100

Add it up. Multiply the monthly costs by twelve. Factor into the equation that only two percent of Equity members are working as performers at any given time. Then subtract the median income of those performers which is roughly $7,500...per year.

I’ve been in the city for some time now. Though the initial two hundred dollars and three suitcases are long gone I have survived and made a life for myself.

My friend Helga, who lived out of milk crates, and I ended up renting and furnishing an apartment together. She’s since gotten married and moved back to Albuquerque. Now it’s just my name on the lease. And all the furniture in this three bedroom apartment is mine.

It’s time to have new headshots taken. I’m making an appointment with a professional New York photographer. I’m planning it for the end of August or the beginning of September.

I cater and teach. I’m back to choosing between working, auditioning or going to class. I would rather be financially stable. But honestly no job these days provides true stability.

When both of my parents died, my inheritance enabled me to live for a few years without a day job. During that time I auditioned, took classes and lessons. This helped me book high paying high profile gigs.

I also booked high profile gigs with theatre celebrities while working 60-70 hours a week at a day job.

There’s no rhyme or reason. Having help from your friends, from your family and from your colleagues isn’t a crime. Doing it on your own is not a necessity. Planning and saving is just as good as winging it. Success or failure doesn’t depend on how you do it, just that you do it.

If you find yourself asking “What’s next?”  be prepared. What’s next could be a move to Chicago, LA, Toronto, Vancouver or New York. Understand that when you attack the “What’s next” question it should be unique to your life, your needs and your level of comfort. Do not try to follow someone else's trajectory. It’s imperative to know what you personally need to thrive. Maybe it’s money like Contadina, or familial support like Amir or massive help from friends and colleagues like me.

Any way you do it, surviving in the city of your choice is tough. There’s a lot of hustle, a lot of work and a lot of sacrifice. In truth no matter what you do or how you plan, where you come from or where you’re going, at some point in your life and career you’ll be just like me asking yourself "What's next?".

I now know the end game. Whether I’m performing in a big budget musical or schlepping to a survival job, "What's next" is always the same...

“...I work all night, I work all day to pay the bills I have to pay”.

Another chance to disapprove, another brilliant zinger...

June is Tony Awards month. And with the Tony Awards comes triumph and heartbreak. With this one night Broadway is shaped and molded into what it’ll be until the next wave of shows open. Careers are made and lives forever changed.

The Tony for best actress in a musical was a tough decision. You had new comer Leanne Cope, Beth Malone, Broadway legend Chita Rivera, and Stage Veterans Kristen Chenoweth and Kelli O’Hara, who had been nominated six times without a win.

By the way I secretly believe that Kelli O’Hara and Audra McDonald are the same person. I’ve never seen them in the same room together. And personally I think they look uncannily similar.

This year saw the first win for Kelli O’Hara, or Audra II as I call her. So I guess that would make this Audra McDonald’s seventh Tony win. You go girl!

Along with the Tony Awards comes the tirade of social media opinions. Everyone sounds off on which shows/people won, which shows/people should have won and which shows/people were snubbed. Heated discussions ensue. And then comes the backlash about the heated discussions. An old colleague of mine threw his hat into the ring with this Facebook post:

“Could EVERYBODY just for ONCE be grateful for what we do and the time and effort that people put in to create and do the Tony Awards ... if any of you arm chair critics were lucky enough to have landed one of these shows that were nominated for a Tony , I'm quite sure your posts would be of a different nature ... everyone's entitled to your opinion but REALLY ??? this is what we DO ... LOVE and SUPPORT people... LOVE and SUPPORT”

I recently went to a seminar about producing commercial theatre, mainly musicals, on Broadway. The reason I went was simple. I wrote a full length book musical. I want that musical to eventually be on Broadway. I know nothing about that aspect of the business, producing a show.

The composer of my show was out of town performing so I went to the seminar by myself. I had no idea what to expect. I just assumed it would be a lot of old washed up actors trying desperately to stay connected to the business by whatever means they could. I also assumed I wouldn’t know anyone there or have any connection to that part of the business. Well I couldn’t have been more wrong. 

The demographic of participants was varied. And yes it did include some very much older show business types. It also included some very young show business types. It included several current Broadway actors as well as new Equity members. In attendance were several people I personally and or professionally knew.

From across the hallway during a break, a Broadway actor and I immediately recognized each other. We squealed with delight, like actors do when seeing each other after a long absence. We hugged and then proceeded to catch up. Seeing her brought back so many memories.

The production we did together was the first time the rights for our show had been released. Our production was the first production of that show regionally after the Broadway run. It was being produced close enough to the City that a myriad of Broadway associated people came to see it.

This was a big deal for me. It was only my second Equity show. And it was my first professional experience being the romantic lead in a show, complete with romantic ballad. My bestie Thurston had been initially called back for the role, but he didn’t book it. I booked the role, after having been cut from the initial audition and then going to a subsequent call for the same role.

Ah those early innocent days of auditioning...

Recently I was in line waiting for an audition. There were about ten people ahead of me, including a woman directly in front of me and a young guy in front of her. The woman looked like she was a “broad”. You know the type: loud, boisterous, pants wearing, been there done that kinda gal who could kill you with one look. The guy was your typical young best friend of the boy next door: quirky-nerdy, nice, and sweet. wouldn’t hurt a fly. The monitor gave us the usual lining up in the hallway speech which includes being respectful of the other actors in line: be quiet, let people focus, don’t use your phones etc. So the three of us stood in silence with the others waiting for our individual turns to audition.

Slowly the line dwindled down. Now I was third to go in the room. Ahead of me was the broad and ahead of her was the young boy. The young boy, who was now at the door, next to go in, turned to the broad and said:

“This is my first Equity Audition. I don’t know what to do. Do I walk in and give them my picture and resume?”

I thought “there is nothing loving and supportive about to happen here...”

After one performance of my second Equity show I was on my way out of the theatre when I saw a friend of friend. He was one of the Broadway people who had come to see this first mounting of the show. I had met the guy a couple of times. I didn’t really know him. He didn’t really know me. As I passed him I said hello. He stopped me and said “Boy, you were up on that stage, just singing and dancing”. I thanked him and went on my way, happy that he seemed to like the show.

I found out later that the guy hated me in the show. He thought I was miscast and talent free. He wanted to not say anything bad about me or my performance so he said something nebulous and vague. He let me, a young boy next door, quirky-nerdy, nice, sweet green-horn newbie make a natural conclusion that he enjoyed the show and my performance. He was under the impression that he was being “loving and supportive.”

If the guy were truly being supportive and nurturing and loving he would have taken me aside and voiced his true opinion. Being a veteran of Broadway, I would have taken his words to heart. Perhaps at that point he could’ve suggested acting teachers or vocal coaches. But because he wanted to “be supportive of all actors and show love towards his fellow performers” he let me go on stage all the while believing that what I was doing on stage was crap.

I’ll never know if my performance was good or not. Does an actor ever? The New York Times liked it and so did many others. There were some who missed the point of my character/characterization and thus reviewed me badly. Or maybe they completely understood, agreed with my friend’s friend’s assessment and reviewed me properly. At any rate these people shared their impressions of my work, good or bad. It was then up to me, as a professional to heed or revel in what they were saying, or just leave it alone. They provided me with the opportunity to learn something about myself and my Art. I could grow as a performer.

I replied to my old colleague's Facebook rant about being loving and supportive...

"...Although I love and support theatre, since it's what I do, Theatre is a business. Do you think Bankers or Brokers love and support each other? No. What about real estate agents? Do you think they're all saying "Good for you Josh Flagg for selling another 20 million dollar estate"? No. They are sizing him up, breaking him down and dissecting him to see what he is doing that they aren't. The people with ambition will try and improve upon the "performance" and surpass it, fix what they see as imperfections and take it to a new height. They ready themselves to take his place. It's this that keeps businesses growing and changing. Artists do the same, except with rawer emotions. And this is what the Theatre needs to survive: growth and change. What I would say is that we as artists need to HONOR what each of us are doing as important and vital and necessary. Sure love and support what you truly care about, what ignites something deep inside of you what moves you, entertains you and delights you, But love and support just for the sake of love and support? Eh, not so much"

Being loving and supportive for the sake of being loving and supportive is counter-productive. It’s like giving baseball teams trophies for showing up. It diminishes the work of the team that won the World Series and devalues the World Series itself.

Some people believe that the Tony Award for best actress in a musical should’ve gone to Chita Rivera. She’s a show biz living legend. Chita’s like 107 years old. She’s been there and done that, and still does it better than anyone else onstage today. When she performs you can’t pull your eyes from her. She is a star and the stage lights up when she’s on it.  Just on principle alone the Tony award should have gone to her. That’s my opinion. And right now my opinion in this matter has no bearing on the outcome. I don't exist in that aspect of the business. And first and foremost Show business is a Business.

I learned in the producing seminar that the budgets to campaign for a Tony Award win are HUGE, like millions and millions of dollars. And for whatever business reasons, maybe because of the Tony campaign, the committee decided to award Audra II the statue. It’s not always about talent. But it is always about Business.

I later saw that friend of a friend, the "you were up there singing and dancing" supportive loving guy, in a show on Broadway. He was horrendous. And quite frankly it made me happy. The man had an amazing singing voice but he could not act. Not even a little bit. You’ve heard the expression “can’t act his way out of a paper bag”? Well this guy wouldn’t be able to act his way out of a paper bag even if a saber-toothed tiger ripped it open for him. 

I chose to say nothing about the show and nothing about him or to him. He didn't deserve my opinion and insight. He was not worthy of love and support. He didn't deserve to have an opportunity to better himself.

My opinion of his lack of acting ability was later validated. His acting was so bad that a condition of him being cast in another show was that he had to take acting lessons. At the end of the lessons the production/creative team would assess whether he would actually be cast or not. That’s good business: protect and hone your investment. That’s nurturing. That is being supportive. That’s a business professional caring enough about someone else in the business to not leave him in the dark about what's really happening. 

The broad and the young boy's interaction continued before he entered the audition room:

Young boy: This is my first Equity Audition. I don’t know what to do. Do I walk in and give them my picture and resume?

Broad: (very sweetly) No. The monitor has already taken in your picture and resume. You just simply walk in and say hello. Then go straight to the accompanist and give him your music. Make sure you give him a tempo. It’s really important to give him your tempo. You walk to the center of the room and signal to the accompanist that you’re ready to start. Then you sing.

Young boy: Thank you so much.

And with that the young boy opened the door and walked in, confident he knew what to do.

I have no trouble voicing my opinion. It’s mine and it counts only as mine. It’s as important as you’d like to make it or it’s as trivial as you believe it to be. I voice my opinion because I care. Hopefully it will give you new information or a new perspective to consider. Maybe it will even make you think about and asses your own views and why you have them. Perhaps it will stir you to educate yourself, hone your talents and better equip you for the world you want to live in. That’s love and support.

As I listened to the young boy sing his heart out, and he was awesome, I turned to the broad.

Me: I hope I’m not interrupting your focus time, but I wanted to say thank you for being so kind to that young boy. Not many people would have been.

Broad: Yeah, no problem. I didn’t have the heart to tell him none of it matters, not even what he sings, since they’re just sizing him up like a piece of meat.

"...I’ll drink to that!"