Once upon a time, on a Halloween not too long ago, three
teenaged couples, Beulah and Leroy, Hattie and Steven, and Dot and Heinrich,
decided to go on a trip. They wanted to
escape the craziness that came with the holiday.
Beulah was a “good girl”. She didn’t smoke or drink or
curse. She was saving herself for marriage. Leroy came from a religious family.
He didn’t eat meat, or sweets or drink soda. They worshipped every day.
Hattie was a sex crazed cheerleader. All she wanted was boys
and more boys. Everything about her was geared to enticing the opposite sex,
especially her clothes. Steven was the boy next door, all-American type. He was
quiet, yet commanding, polite and had a desire to make everyone happy.
Dot looked like a little porcelain doll. However she was
aggressive and pushy, and had a mouth like a sailor. Heinrich matched her on
every level, full of bravado and testosterone.
The getaway spot they chose was in the jungle. It was remote
and isolated. By the time they arrived it was almost dark. Each couple chose a
cabin and went to settle in.
Next on Hattie’s to do list was Steven. After she unpacked
she put on a sexy outfit, and began her seduction.
Dot wanted to snuggle indoors by the fireplace. Heinrich
wanted to explore the dark, dank jungle around them. They fought about choosing
which to do. The expletives freely flew out of their mouths.
Beulah was tired. She was always tired. All she wanted to do
was take a nap. Leroy went about planning the meals for the weekend, making
sure to stick to the strict diet he had set up for himself and Beulah.
It was midnight when it happened. Beulah and Leroy were
preparing for bed. They were both on their knees saying their evening prayers.
Boom. Boom. Boom.
There was loud, heavy knocking on the front door of their
cabin.
Beulah and Leroy didn’t want to be interrupted. They figured
it was one of the other couples. Whoever it was could wait until prayers were
done. Leroy and Beulah continued. Then...
BOOM. BOOM. BOOM.
Again there was knocking. This time it became louder and
more aggressive.
Beulah and Leroy continued to ignore it.
BOOM! BOOM!
Leroy had had enough. Someone this rude and impatient could
only be Heinrich. Feed up with
Heinrich’s aggressiveness, Leroy got up to answer the door.
BOOM!
The last knock shattered the door into splinters.
Beulah screamed when she saw what was at the door. It wasn’t
Heinrich. It was a hideous monster that stood eight feet tall, covered in fur
matted with old, dried blood, with huge saber tooth tiger fangs, and hands the
size of shovels. Each finger ended in razor sharp talons.
Beulah shut her eyes tight and prayed harder than she ever
had in her life.
Leroy had seen plenty of scary movies. He knew he and Beulah
would be the first to die. They were
always the first to die. The monster slowly lumbered into the cabin. Leroy
tugged at Beulah’s arm and tried to pull her away. She wouldn’t budge. She just
closed her eyes tighter.
Leroy knew he wasn’t equipped to fight this demon. All he
had were the papers his dietary plans were written on. He flung them into the
monster’s face, confusing him. Then Leroy grabbed Beulah and practically
dragged her to the back door of the cabin.
Just as they were about to escape, the monster clawed at
Beulah’s leg, snapping her Achilles tendon. Leroy tried to pull her out of
harm’s way, but it was too late. The beast slit Beulah’s other tendon and now
she was crippled. The monster ripped off one of Beulah’s legs and then the
other. As she screamed in pain, Leroy ran.
Dot and Heinrich couldn’t hear the commotion over their
fighting.
Hattie and Steven couldn’t hear Beulah’s screams over the
music that was blaring in their cabin.
In her efforts to seduce Steven, Hattie was playing her
favorite pop song. She had turned the volume up way too high. Then Hattie sang
along to the sexy song, doing a sort of stripper-esque dance. It was all to
entice Steven. But he wasn’t really interested in her. He didn’t find her sexy
or attractive. He thought Hattie was a
skank that tried to sleep with everyone.
Steven constantly stared in the mirror. He dressed well and
he was polite. He was all American and good-looking. He couldn’t figure out why
he always attracted this kind of person. Never the less, he went along with
Hattie’s seduction. He didn’t want to hurt her feelings.
Not getting the response she wanted, Hattie decided to
change into something even more revealing.
Boom. Boom. Boom.
There was loud, heavy knocking on the front door of the cabin.
Hattie told Steven to close his eyes and to not to answer
the door. She wanted to be alone with him.
BOOM. BOOM. BOOM.
Again there was knocking. This time it became louder and
more aggressive.
Steven thought someone this rude and impatient could only be
Heinrich.
Hattie announced that she was ready and for Steven to open
his eyes.
BOOM! BOOM!
And just as Hattie opened the door to the bedroom...
BOOM!
The front door of the cabin flew open. In the doorway was
the monster, with Beulah’s legs in its clutches.
Hattie screamed which startled the beast. It threw the legs
at her. Then it lumbered toward Steven, fresh blood dripping from its claws and
fangs. Hattie screamed again. The monster turned and roared in her direction.
Steven had fallen off the chair he was sitting on and began to make a move
toward the back door. The monster grabbed Steven’s leg and raised his talons.
Hattie screamed again. The monster roared more fiercely than
before and dropped Steven’s leg. It trudged over to Hattie, who began screaming
more loudly and consistently. This infuriated the beast. It grabbed her by the
throat and squeezed until there was a cracking noise. Steven watched in horror
as blood and human tissue gushed through the monster’s claws. Steven tried to
gather his senses. Then he ran out the back door.
Boom. Boom. Boom.
Heinrich and Dot were still fighting. They weren’t in the
mood to be disturbed. But he answered the door anyway. It was Steven. He told
him to go away.
BOOM. BOOM. BOOM.
Heinrich answered the door again. He berated Steven for
disturbing him and Dot and slammed the door in Steven’s face.
BOOM! BOOM!
This time Dot answered the door. The look on Steven’s face
told her something was wrong. Dot could see a huge figure looming in the distance.
She pulled Steven into the cabin and closed the door.
Once inside, Steven tried his best to tell Dot and Heinrich
what had happened. Heinrich refused to believe him. Dot was enrapt in the story
when -
BOOM!
The front door of the cabin burst open.
Standing in the doorway was the beast, gnarling and
growling, still clutching Hattie’s severed head. The monster roared a fierce
roar. Steven grabbed Dot by the hand and made a break for the back door. The
monster reached over and grabbed Dot by the waist. It pulled her back in.
The beast raised Dot to his horrible fanged mouth and
readied to snap her in two. Dot kicked the beast in the face, once then twice
then three times. It howled in pain and
threw Dot on the floor. She lay in a lump, unmoving.
Steven stood frozen for a moment. He knew they couldn’t slay
the beast alone. So he ran for help. Heinrich watched, then decided he didn’t
need any help. He would make this monster his bitch. He jumped on to the its
back and began punching it. The monster whirled around clawing, but couldn’t
reach Heinrich.
The monster smashed Heinrich up against a wall. But Heinrich
was resolute. No way was he letting go. It smashed him again and again. Finally
Heinrich had to give up. He slid off the beast and made his way towards the
back door. The monster jumps in-between Heinrich and the door. But Heinrich
slid between the beast’s legs and started to run.
Slash!
With a swing of a claw, a talon caught Heinrich’s leg. He
fell to the ground. He had no choice but to try and crawl away from the scene.
Leaves rustled under Heinrich as he moved through the jungle. Behind him he
heard a bellow, then the slow methodical thud of the beast coming after him...
Beulah, Hattie, Dot, Leroy, Steven and Heinrich are all
performers. They all came to New York City to pursue careers in theatre.
Beulah is a dancer. She was offered an opportunity to
perform. She prayed on it. Moving to a new city, finding a place to live and
renting or buying a car for a year was too hard. Besides she had done this type
of contract before. She believed she was past that point in her career. She
turned down the opportunity because God said not to do it. She’s trudging away
at her two day jobs.
Beulah's career died that night in the jungle. The monster got her.
Leroy was told he would never really make it in this
business because of his weight. He was never fat, just not ripped. He was
always on a diet and in the gym. He tried. He tried very hard. He was offered
the same exact opportunity as Beulah. He took it. After a year away from the
city he came back. He threw away the diet and workouts. Leroy ended up getting
a performing gig rather quickly. The company that he did that year contract for
was affiliated with another show. That other show is on Broadway and so is he.
Leroy's career escape the clutches of the beast.
Hattie is a singer. She has a smooth voice. Hattie chooses
sexy songs to perform at auditions. Also she auditions for the sexy roles. To
look at her, one does not think conventionally sexy. You think sweet and nice
and friendly and fun. That’s why everyone loves her, except the people behind
the tables. She confuses them by singing material not appropriate to who she
appears to be. She doesn’t make the connection between not getting the job and
the women who do get the jobs, the conventionally sexy ones. She gets out there,
but she keeps trying to be something she’s not. And right now, the one things
she’s not, is employed.
Hattie's career was the next to die in the jungle.
Steven was the same as Hattie. He had always seen himself
differently than others saw him. He was different. He was good-looking but not
handsome, a bit older but not too old, tall but not overly so, and out of shape
but not fat. He has a leading man’s voice quality but not the conventional
looks. So it’s an uphill battle. Steven has decided to stop going for roles
that required leading men and move towards the roles that he looked like: a
dad, a father of two complete with “dad bod”. He’s gotten more callbacks in a
year than he has in the past seven years combined.
Steven's career sustained some wounds, but it looks like it’ll
survive.
Dot is a musical theatre performer. She’s, short, petit and
cute with huge eyes. She actually looks like a doll. Dot is almost thirty years
old, but because of her size appears to be about 17 or 18. Her personality is
strong and aggressive and she has been known to curse up a storm. She’s noticing
that she can’t book a gig; not a grown up role or a kid role. She thinks it
might have something to do with how she’s perceived in the audition room. She’s
starting to investigate the possibilities of what action to take to help her be
more cast-able.
Being thrown to the floor by the monster put Dot's career in a coma.
Will she fight to survive, or just give up all hope?
Heinrich has appeared in my blog before. He’s a little guy
who looks 15 but is really almost 35. Talented, yes. Stubborn and refusing to
accept the fact that he will play teens for a very long time? Hell yes. He
fights tooth and nail to avoid being type cast as a child. He’s even had major
discussions with his agency about being sent on those kinds of auditions. But
that’s the work he books.
Heinrich's career was maimed by the beast. He escaped, only to be
institutionalized. Everyone thinks he’s crazy because he believes the beast is
still after him. And it is.
What’s gotten in the way of each of these performers is their
preconceived notions about who they are and how they appear. The monster in
this movie is Ego. It’s the part of us that’s responsible for our sense of
personal identity.
Having a healthy sense of self is very important in the
business of Show. It helps us survive. It’s when that sense of self becomes
over-blown, under-fed or just off kilter that the problems begin. There is too
much negativity, too many “no’s” and far too much down time between gigs. That
feeds the monster within. When the beast grows strong enough it, lives on its
own. Then it rampages through the jungle, or country side, or suburb, or city,
killing off good careers, and extinguishing potential stars.
These four couples, all beautiful people and all very talented,
believe they are more than their external package. And they are. If they get higher on the ladder of success, they can have some control over
which projects they take on. But for now, their package (both external and
internal) is what will get them work. Without the work, these wonderful performers
can’t get recognition. Without the recognition they can't climb up that ladder to gain career
control. And it's career control they want. Then they can play sexy, play the leading man or to
simply play an adult, on stage.
Don’t let your Ego monster, or fighting against your
physical type, be the thing that keeps you from doing what you love.
In this horror film about performing, if...
“...Wanna save your skin boy? Wanna save your hide? You
wanna see tomorrow? Better step aside...”
